The Bigger They Are...

A friend is recuperating from surgery, and in a recent exchange of emails, she told me I should write an advice column. That made me laugh, and I told her she was free to ignore anything that sounded like "advice" coming from me, because I have never had a day of pain in my life.

I actually called myself the "pain virgin".

Never giving any thought to the risky karma....

The next day, I was attending a luncheon on the Rock Island Arsenal (with Abraham and Mary Todd Lincoln reenactors) -- and I took a bad fall.

I mean -- it was a really bad, is-she-still-conscious-kind of falls. I got to live out the cliche -- "the bigger they are, the harder they fall" . My legs went out from under me (flip flops, Rita? really??) -- and on the way down, the back of my head banged against a locked steel door knob. It felt like a burly football player had full-tilt swung a bat and hit the back of my head...

I laid there, stunned for a minute, before I realized I'd cracked my head open...and blood was pooling in my hair. Then, everything that is the Federal Government (thank you, Rock Island Arsenal) -- kicked in.

One of the women hosting the luncheon said, "don't try to get up, dear..." And I said, "you don't need to worry about that..."

In the blink of an eye -- I had a firetruck, ambulance, three cute EMT guys...holy cow...

Hey -- I had my camera in my purse, thinking the Lincoln Lunch would be a good thing to blog about...

The end of this entertaining story is that I spent the afternoon in the emergency room. I got a tetanus shot and two staples in my head. And I realized once again that I will NEVER be a nurse.

My cousin Linda followed the ambulance over to the hospital -- then gave me a ride home.  WHAT WOULD WE DO WITHOUT SISTERS AND COUSINS, PEOPLE???

The lesson?   Yes, Karma is a bitch.  AND I am done bragging about my pain-free life.

So -- there will be a brief blogging break...