Finale Flops

I am right in the middle of blogging about my fabulous day of Vashon Island -- and I really am working up to my "Rita Luck" end-of-the-day-on-Vashon...

BUT -- today -- you're gonna get this instead...

I've been watching these "reality" shows for months now -- and it's all coming together in one big BLOW OUT of a week.  However -- it started Sunday night with Celebrity Apprentice...and you know what a disappointment that was....ugh...

Okay -- moving on to Dancing With The Stars.  Katherine Jenkins has been on the top of the leader board more times than anybody this season -- and with Mark Ballas as a partner -- she looked like a sure thing...but, of course -- that's not what happened...

But, hey -- I stilI have my "American Idol". 

I feel like I'm the only person I know who actually WATCHES this show anymore (even Valerie gave up on it).  But maybe the truth is, it just got so lame that nobody with any self-respect will ADMIT they watch it...Anyway -- the Finale ended up being Jessica and Phillip.  NO JOSHUA??!!

(And I didn't even have Donald Trump to blame.)

But -- clearly -- Jessica is a way better singer/performer than Phillip.  Even though she is only 16 years old -- she KILLS IT every time she sings. If you don't believe me -- check her out on YouTube

Whereas -- every time Phillip sings -- I find myself having flashbacks to Taylor Hicks...AND, if you are thinking, "Who's Taylor Hicks?" -- I REST MY CASE...

However -- for just a moment -- I need to put picking a winner aside -- to speak to the producers of American Idol.  If you value your job -- you should listen carefully.  Because Simon Cowell has left an agent working to sabotage your show.  In an effort to save his imitation-show-the-X-Factor -- he is paying somebody at American Idol to make sure you make the WORST DECISIONS POSSIBLE.

Starting with -- YOU HAD YOUR FINALE ON TUESDAY NIGHT??  Seriously??  Opposite the Dancing With The Stars Finale??  WHO sold this idea?  Check out their finances...Simon Cowel is PAYING THEM OFF...

Then -- for the big duets -- instead of having our beloved American Idol alum Jennifer Hudson sing the Dream Girls hit with Jessica Sanchez (I mean -- SHE DID WIN THE OSCAR for singing this song) -- no, no, no -- you decided to pair her with the over-the-hill-formerly-famous-Jennifer Holliday-the-woman-of-many-scarry-faces.  WHAT??  Jennifer Holliday was so determined to OUT-sing young Jessica I thought her head was going to explode.  It was terrifying...

But, hey -- that's not even the worst...

If you watched the show -- you know what I'm going to say, don't you.  Sorry for the reminder -- but here it is.  A picture of Fantasia Barrino singing with Joshua at the Finale.  And yes, those are sequins leggings.  With slits all the way up both sides...who even knew that was possible??  WHAT??  HOW???  WHY???

My bet is the same person who said, "let's do the finale on Tuesday for a change" -- went shoppping with Fantasia and told her this outfit looked fab...

As my friend Mark Lipinski said...."are there words?"....

Not really...

Back to the winner.  No -- Jessica did NOT win.  Even though her final song has over 5 MILLION hits on YouTube (versus 750,000 for Phillip)...she was the runner-up.  It just doesn't seem possible...
Don't ask me what all this means...I am clueless.  But this year, I am actually looking forward to summer re-runs...I am exhausted.  I need a break... 

Except that -- the very next night -- So You Think You Can Dance started a new season...

And there's a new show with Kelly Clarkson and Jennifer Nettles..."Duets"....

OH MY GOD...I MUST BE A GLUTTEN FOR PUNISHMENT.....