Thanksgiving & Flexibility

For a few years -- John and I were alone for Thanksgiving. Elliott and Ross were living in Georgia and Minnesota. I tried to picture in my head what it would be like.  Cooking Thanksgiving dinner for just the two of us. Hummm?? What was once romantic, (as newlyweds in 1970) now seemed impossibly lonely. And LIKE A LOT OF WORK..

So, I was delighted when my niece Amy invited us to join her family for Thanksgiving. I was more than happy to cook side dishes for her feast -- and even John enjoyed the hustle bustle of Amy's little boys and her house full of Thanksgiving guests...

That girl can rock an apron!

A lot has changed since those empty-nester years.  Ross moved home and is going to nursing school.  After 15 years of living away, and missing Thanksgiving completely -- he is actually back in the house.

And -- Elliott and Emily got out of the Army and settled five five minutes from us. They, of course, have TWO CHILDREN...

So, I joyfully went back to cooking the Thanksgiving dinner at my house. I want to make "Grandma's house" memories for Lilly and Warren.

Ahhh....those grandchildren....

In 2009, Lilly was eight months old for her first Thanksgiving...

Leopard and black velvet....PERFECT...

And her look-alike brother!! What bounty, eh?? Warren was 11 months old for his First Thanksgiving...

Lilly -- in her Thanksgiving leopard outfit the year she was two. Yes, she is loving the leopard...

Last year, she reluctantly tried on five leopard outfits...with Sophie looking on, of course...

I thought wearing leopard would be a charming Thanksgiving tradition that we would do year after year. But, as it turns out, it became something Lilly and I argued about -- so I had to let it go. (yes, I am living inside a Disney movie)...

I'm over it. And that's the lesson.  I cared about the leopard -- but Lilly did not.  So what purpose was being served by me insisting?  Where is the Grandma memory in that??

However -- the thing that HAS BECOME a wonderful tradition is that Lillian spends the night here on Wednesday.  She "helps me cook". We put on our aprons...(she has her own apron hook in the kitchen)....and we cook... 

The very, very best part of Thanksgiving isn't about the meal at all. (that turkey is always a crap shoot)... The Grandma Memory will be Lilly and I working together in the kitchen, wearing our aprons, and listening to Christmas music.

The Grandma memory will be the two of us watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade -- and talking about NEW YORK CITY.  These are the moments she will remember when she is 70 years old...
Here's the thing....keep your eye on the prize.

On this day, you may have an opportunity to make a lasting memory with somebody you love.  I hope.  Be flexible.  If none of your people want to wear leopard -- let it go.  If the gravy is lumpy -- move to Plan B (have some canned gravy in the pantry).  If somebody important doesn't come -- joyfully move forward with THOSE WHO SHOWED UP...

At the end of the day -- people will not remember whether the turkey was dry or who came late to dinner.  But they will ALWAYS remember the way you made them feel...