The Irish Gypsy Show

After ALL THE BIG FINALES last week -- American Idol, Celebrity Apprentice, Dancing with the Stars and the Biggest Loser -- my television-watching-life was looking pretty dismal. BUT I HAVE BEEN SAVED...by TLC. The network of such classics as "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant", and "Sister Wives"....the birthplace of "Jon & Kate Plus Eight"....TLC has imported a new show from England.

The show is called, "My Great Big Fat Gypsy Wedding". It's about Irish Gypsies. WHO KNEW THERE WERE IRISH GYPSIES???

Hey, you know me -- I'm all about educational television. So far -- here's what I learned from watching two sneak peek episodes...

• Irish gypsies refuse to live in normal buildings -- they prefer trailers -- even though most of them never actually move.
• At the age of 8 -- they have their first communion in elaborate gowns that can weigh 70 pounds..(the little girls can hardly walk)...
• Gypsy mothers dress their little girls in such sexy outfits -- they make the "Toddler & Tiara" girls look like little puritans...
• They marry very young -- and the whole purpose of the wedding is to have the biggest, most elaborately decorated gown in the history of gypsy-culture.
• Gypsy women do not work outside of the home (by that, I mean trailer...)
  
• Gypsies do not believe in indoor bathrooms. (by that, I mean toilets...)

Of course, once I stumbled onto this fascinating new show, I immediately called Valerie and said, "quick -- turn on channel 67. These are your people..." (Val is very proud of her Irish heritage.)

After watching the first two episodes, Val called me back to say these are most definitely NOT her people. According to Val, there are three types of Irish.

1. The aristocratic "Yeats was my uncle" Irish..(Val's people)...
2. The shanty Irish...and, apparently --
   
3. The "get your trailer the hell out of my yard" Irish..(a third echelon she was unaware of)

So -- there you have it. Tonight on TLC. You are welcome....you will thank me for this television tip...

After watching, you will understand why, in the middle of episode two, she called during a commercial and said, "when did Frederick's of Hollywood start designing communion outfits for eight year old girls?"

I'm still laughing...