That made me laugh out loud.
Although I am WELL AWARE that everything you read in this blog is scrubbed and sanitized by me, I didn't realize I was making my life seem perfect.
I simply don't write about any bad stuff...family discord, arguments, disappointments, worries -- but you HAD to know there was bad stuff, right?
Cuz, believe me, sister -- MY LIFE IS FAR FROM PERFECT.
So, in the interest of letting you see behind the curtain...I've decided to write about a recent Grandma Melt-down.
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| Lilly and Warren are my heart...as you know...the most joyful part of my life. |
It was a Saturday. The kids had spent the night, and they usually get up and have breakfast on the porch.
Lilly and Warren butt heads... often. She's 10, knows everything, and is well on her way to perfecting the art of bad-attitude eye rolling...he's 6 and takes his lead from her, and can be VERY annoying. On this morning, they were at each other. A lot. They argued about their breakfast bowls, or where they were going to sit, who left the puzzle pieces on the floor, who should brush their teeth first...who did what last night. Both of them kept insisting THEY WERE RIGHT...and THE OTHER PERSON WAS ALL WRONG. She punched him, Warren started to cry, I started to yell...she said he punched her first....he said she was lying...she tried to cut off his toe...she said he was lying...AARGH.
We had plans to do something special that day. (I can't remember what). The first two hours of the morning was nothing but the two of them constantly bickering. I tried to play referee, and cajole them into a better mood...but they were just AT EACH OTHER...
I asked them to find their shoes...and they both rolled their eyes, and started to move in molasses mode...both of them now clearly pouting. It was literally the straw that broke the camel's back.
I lost it. Completely.
It was a total Grandma Melt Down...
There's no other way to describe what happened.
They broke me.
I started to scream...and curse...(I'll leave the actual curse words out, but it was as bad as you can imagine)...
My rant went something like this...
I'M SICK AND TIRED OF ALL THIS JANGELING OVER___________ NOTHING. THIS HAS BEEN________ TORTURE FOR ME. WHO THE ____DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? I GO TO A LOT OF_________ TIME AND TROUBLE TO PLAN ACTIVITIES FOR THE TWO OF YOU, BUT I AM NOT LEAVING THIS _____HOUSE WITH THE TWO OF YOU IN A POUT.
SO HERE'S HOW THIS DAY IS GOING TO GO.
THANKS TO YOUR ________ATTITUDE THIS MORNING, WE ARE NOT DOING ONE___________ THING TODAY. NO_________ GAMES, NO________ CRAFTING, NO DAY TRIPS. NO________ ACTIVITIES WHATSOEVER.
YOU HAVE BEEN MEAN-SPIRITED TO ONE ANOTHER ALL MORNING, AND I CAN'T STAND IT. AND YOU CERTAINLY DON'T HAVE ONE SINGLE BIT OF APPRECIATION FOR WHAT I DO FOR YOU. SO FINE.__________ I'M NOT DOING ANYTHING FOR YOU TODAY. I'M OFFICIALLY GOING BACK TO BED AND I DON'T GIVE A RAT'S ASS WHAT THE TWO OF YOU DO FOR THE REST OF THE__________ DAY.
Hey...I'm not proud of it. They pushed me over the cliff...
I went to my room -- and slammed the door so hard, it almost came off it's hinges.
I'm sure those two children were terrified...but I was furious.
And I stayed in my room until I calmed down. I was crying (OF COURSE)...and I was soo upset with myself for losing it. I mean -- I AM the adult here. What kind of an example am I setting for them? The fit they just witnessed is NOT how I want them to behave...ugh...
We all get angry...but is this how I want them to deal with anger??
Tomorrow -- the REST of the story...
(well, maybe...I'm sending this from a grocery store WIFI...because after a recent crazy storm, we lost poser for a day, and now have no internet....)
OMG! I know the morning was bad, but the retelling had me laughing. I was playing fill in the blanks with various combinations of "words". Waiting for the "rest of the story" :-)
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