Friday, May 26, 2017

Ross and Ivory Soap


Ross is looking for a house. So, perusing Realtor.com has become my new hobby.  When Mary was here, we went to a few Open Houses...and I've learned about all 33 parks in Davenport, Iowa.  (well done, Davenport!).

Unfortunately,  it's a seller's market right now...so every time a decent house comes on the market that Ross might be able to afford, it goes PENDING before the day is over.  He is very frustrated...

Then, just when I'm feeling bad for Ross -- I remember -- I DON'T WANT HIM TO MOVE OUT ANYWAY!!  He is my television buddy.  Right now, we're watching episodes of  Sons of Anarchy every night.  (we've done Downton Abby, Mad Men, Entourage, Homeladn...etc.)

It seems to me I AM THE ONLY ONE who realizes how important these last four years have been for Lilly and Warren.
Uncle Ross attends all of Lilly's school events...
He's the one who SETS EVERYTHING UP
Uncle Ross takes the kids to the park...he's the one who takes care of their band-aids, clips their hang-nails...
When he takes them to the park, he packs sunscreen (or mittens, depending on the weather), and bottled water.
Ross has been working as an RN for a year now at the Birth Center.  He calls his co-workers "the other girls"...and most of them are 20-something young women.  One of them (I'll call her Jane) was   showing off her favorite lavender soap, which costs $9 a bar...

Ross:  YOU MUST BE NUTS!!  I quit buying Irish Spring when I realized I could buy Ivory soap, 10 bars for $4.50.

Jane:  (showing him her beautiful bar of hand-crafted soap)...Yes, but look at this, Ross.  Smell it.  You can actually see the lavender in the soap...

Ross:  I don't smell anything...and for all you know, those specs could be oregano.

Jane:  Oregano!!  Wait until I tell my farmer in France you think his hand-picked lavender looks like oregano.

Ross:  There are farmers in France who are hand-picking lavender?

Jane:  Of course.

Ross:  No wonder the French could never win a war...HEY -- WE'VE BEEN INVADED. AGAIN.  OUR PEOPLE ARE STARVING...SOMEBODY GET BUSY AND GO OUT THERE TO PLANT MORE LAVENDER...

**************

You can understand why I'm going to miss Ross.  But I won't be the only one... 



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