Nancy Zieman

On July 22, 2017, I received an email from Nancy, saying the cancer was back...and she was going into hospice.

I wrote back one of those tearful LIFE IS NOT FAIR...and YOU HAVE MEANT SO MUCH TO ME...emails...I reminisced about some of my memories -- and how important I felt the first time I walked the aisles of Quilt Market with NZ. EVERYBODY would come up to her, and say how much they loved Sewing With Nancy.

Nancy Zieman was ALWAYS, without fail, gracious and kind to every person. Posing for every picture, noticing every sewn garment, remembering names of dealers she hadn't seen in years...she was amazing.

Then, I thought about how everybody in her world felt the same way -- and we were all trying to tell her what a difference she made, and to thank her for being such a wonderful friend...

And how depressing all those heartfelt good-byes would be.

Here's the thing. When somebody is dying -- you don't know what to say. NOBODY DOES. When compared to dying -- everything else seems unimportant and trivial. Of course you worry that you'll say the WRONG thing. Even Hallmark can't figure it out. It's too late for a "Get Well Soon" card...

But the worst mistake you can make is to say nothing....so I decided I would write to Nancy about normal, everyday stuff.

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Dear Nancy,

I will continue to send these Iowa reports, Nancy...because you were so encouraging...

When I wake up, one of my first thoughts is that I hope you have a good day. Then, remembering the kindness you always showed people, Nancy -- I take a look at my own day, and determine to make the most of it...to do something kind...to be creative...to pass it on in some way.

(...blah, blah, blah....and I wrote about a Grandma Camp baking adventure...)

Love,
rita



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Rita,

I love to vicariously live through your emails. You have no idea what these notes mean to me. The story of the fondant (Which I have never attempted to make),  Monday cleaning, book club, are priceless. You’re one of the BEST grandmother’s I know. Wish I could hear Lily sing from Hamilton!

Next week if all goes well, the boys and family will be here to celebrate Adeline’s first birthday. I will control from the couch, but being there is the most important part.

Your kind comments about talking to people during trade shows is not totally true. Flying to Paducah, the plane was cancelled in Memphis, I rented a car and asked other quilties to drive with me. I gave the map (pre-cell phone days) to someone I later learned didn’t know north from the bottom of her purse, and arrived in Paducah 2-hours later than we should have. (I should have commandeered the map sooner.)

After the quilties waved bye bye, I was famished with a headache as big as a house, took a trolley to a restaurant, and had a quiet dinner in a corner. On the way back to the hotel, 6-7 fans got on the trolley and screamed “Nancy Zieman,” I nodded but didn’t elaborate... A week later I got a scathing letter from one of them, “How dare I  . . . .” It was awful. Only once in my career (that I know if) did I ever want to hide in a corner when a viewer approached me and that was the payback. Now you know!

Mornings are my best time so I better get answering other emails. Thank you for theses glimpses into your life, Rita...you make me smile...

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Starting on July 27, 2017...I sent an email to Nancy every morning.   My last email to her was November 13, 2017.

Tomorrow -- the gifts Nancy gave me...